Disconnect: Getting Back On the Same Page

For years now, I have worked in spaces in which people from various sectors bring their diverse experiences and identities to bear on collective issues.

Utopia, you might think. Everyone getting along, room for everyone, and everyone feeling heard and valued.

Okay, soooo…not exactly, and this is what I want to address.

When groups first form, there is what I call a pink bubble period, where things are wonderful and everyone is engaged and excited to hear multiple perspectives on a common issue, to learn from each other’s experience and to be generally welcoming and invitational.

I am used to working in spaces in which professionals interact with local people who are taking action to change something in their community that matters to them. In this regard, I try to balance power and provide ways for people to understand each other’s perspectives.

The professionals I work with represent community-based organizations, national charities and municipalities, and they can come with the weight of bureaucracy on their shoulders. They are required to stick to a defined definition of their roles and the kinds of interactions they can support. And underneath all of that they are people: who probably started doing the work they are because they wanted to make a difference and contribute to building their communities.

The grassroots folks have often put their heart and soul into organizing their community around critical needs. They are largely overburdened, feeling the weight of a lot of the issues they are seeking to address. By their nature grassroots activists are personally touched by the issues they are fighting for. The woman who is speaking at City Hall for increased daycare subsidy is rushing home after to pick her toddler up at her neighbour’s: she knows what she is talking about because she is living it.

And there can be a deep disconnect between these two groups: professionals feeling judged by grassroots leaders for the narrow scope of their influence and impact, and grassroots folks feeling discounted or used by the organizations that the professionals they interact with work for.

Have you ever heard the expression “Don’t throw the baby out with the bathwater”? Loosely defined, it means just because one thing has lost value doesn’t mean the whole exercise was a waste.

But we tend to do just that: give up on the entire exercise because one aspect of it didn’t go as we planned.

When we bring together people from various sectors and various cultures and identities we create vast opportunity for connection and co-learning. We benefit from new ways of approaching our work, of seeing our communities and each other.

But it isn’t Utopia. It takes work. And vigilance. And constant care and attention.

And when it works…when it works, well, it can change the world!!